Use Good Type Descriptions
My next tip is simple. I urge you to read and hilite the type descriptions of INFJ and INFP in
The 16 Personality Types,
Descriptions for Self-Discovery,
by Dr. Linda Berens and Dr. Dario Nardi.
It will cost you a whopping ten bucks -- and don't tell
me you can't afford it!
What did you pay for that computer you're
surfing on right now??
This is one Telos publication I didn't work on and really wish I had, although I've helped it in other ways. Look for my name inside!
Let me tell you how this book is different from all other type descriptions you have likely read. The other type descriptions floating around (especially those on the internet, and I include Keirsey's) are based on hypothetical composites of what a particular type "looks like." So descriptions get colored (or romanticized) by author bias, or contaminated by author vocabulary. And bias is a problem, whether it's positive or negative.
Many descriptions portray INFJs more idealistically or glamorously than INFPs, attracting people to that pattern even when it doesn't fit! INFJs are made out to be upbeat go-getters, and INFPs are made out to be chronically depressed and disorganized.
My favorite bias is in Keirsey's remark: "The small number of this type (little more than 2 percent) is regrettable, since [INFJs] have an unusually strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others and genuinely enjoy helping their companions."
Ogod, now everyone wants to be a "regrettably rare" INFJ. (Didja know his wife's an INFJ? No wonder he waxes poetic about that type!) It doesn't take Einstein to figure out which type anyone would prefer to be -- especially INFPs who make value judgments reflexively! Let's just forget the many people who'd like to strangle INFJs for being ornery. Gah!
Linda's book is different because: a) it's based on 64 actual interviews with Real People who are clear examples of their type, and b) the descriptions are written using the very language of the people (types) interviewed. Then, to make it even better, the descriptions are offered in 3 different forms:
a "snapshot" that briefly describes the type;
a portrait that depicts the pattern by describing how other people see you; and
a self-portrait, written as if spoken in first person, as if you yourself wrote it.
NO OTHER AUTHOR OFFERS THIS KIND OF REALITY-BASED TYPE DESCRIPTION!! So spend ten bucks and get one of the best Type tools around.
Then, when you have the descriptions in front of you, go through the INFP and INFJ descriptions with a hiliter and mark the sections that accurately describe YOU. (If you can't bear to deface the book, xerox the pages and mark up the copies.) No doubt you will hilite a portion of both descriptions. But when you are finished, one description will probably be more colored-in than the other, which provides a powerful clue about which type you likely are.
By the way, it's important to actually do this exercise with a marker in hand -- and not just do it "in your head." People -- especially iNtuiting types -- are notorious for mentally going through the motions, which leads them to inaccurately conclude their original hypothesis was correct or the exercise was useless. Break the cycle -- perform the assignment!
(Okay, if you're too cheap to buy a danged book, here are a few descriptions on the internet I can live with. But buy the book as soon as you can!)
